Friday, August 24, 2012

"Appalachian Spring", Aaron Copland

Obviously, I failed to publish a post on Wednesday. I've been having difficulty getting my words to feel right for the last couple of weeks. But why should they, given that most of my life doesn't feel right at the moment. As I wrote last Friday, classes have resumed at my old school, and I cannot help but question my decision to leave and go public with "my" revelation. Yes, I "know" that I did the right thing, but that doesn't make me feel any better. Yes, I "knew" how challenging this task would be, but that doesn't make me feel better either. To be bluntly honest, there have been a lot of days lately where I wanted to kick God in the balls for giving me this job, not that she has balls, but you know what I mean. I don't plan on quitting, I just want to share the pain; then I think about the cross and my "suffering" seems rather petty.

So where does that leave me? It leaves me to muddle on through as best as I can. Which, when you think about it, is really what life is all about. We can pretend that humanity knows what it's doing, but that's just wishful thinking. All of creation is just muddling on through, and maybe that's the point. Maybe that's the only thing that truly makes sense. We can plan, orchestrate, and choreograph all we want, but sometimes we just have to let the music and dance of life take over.

And so for today I offer to you "Appalachian Spring" by Aaron Copland. If there was ever a soundtrack for Creation, this is it. You can feel the noise and bustle of life in its notes. It takes you to grand places, but it starts and finishes with peace. That is what I feel most when I listen to it: peace. And that is what I desire most right now: peace.

Check out this music on Wikipedia, YouTube, or Amazon.